Showing posts from April, 2020

Boundaries | A Tough Concept in Society

Over the years I have tried to define what my idea of boundaries are. At some point I even have exclaimed that I didn't like the word “boundary” because it meant that I'm separating myself from being helpful to people. Well, Im here to debunk even my own old belief system.  Being a kind, good, helpful, open person, does not mean that I neglect myself & harm my personal energy system just to accommodate another person. Period. Societally we aren't truly taught boundaries so inevitably we become people-pleasers. When we were children our parents tell us: “Give ___ a hug/kiss for that present and say thank you!"  Right off the bat no one asks us if we are comfortable with physical touch or expressing gratitude in that way. Parents MEAN WELL... Im not taking away from the lesson of showing thanks for a gesture or a gift. But automatically we are taught that physical touch is something we need to give another person in order to make them feel better. The

Reach Out & Touch The Stillness | Self-Portrait Series

I have been uncovering my creativity more and more during all of this... & admittedly, its getting weird. Then again, I have always been quirky, so I guess Im getting more in touch with my true self. I often feel like I have created a box for myself & I yearn to step outside of it & push myself beyond whatever borders I unconsciously put in place. The other day I was majorly anxious (I have anxiety every day), but this day was particularly tough for some reason. I was so restless & irritable. I realized that in all the stillness going on in the world, I haven't taken enough time to explore my own. So, I dedicated time to a self-portrait project that portrays just that...reaching out & touching the stillness. I wanted my photos to tell a story of: my isolation, feeling trapped, feeling free, my fear, and my peace. Honestly, I have been feeling all of these opposing emotions like a roller coaster, on repeat. So, I open up my vulnerability for you to see &

Dear Self | A Rupi Kuar Project

So, to give some context here... @rupikaur_  did a live video for a writing workshop at the onset of quarantine. Firstly, during such a time, I was so deeply grateful for her giving her time freely and for the opportunity to disconnect from COVID-19 for a little while and dig deep. The first project was a free-writing assignment. We had to begin with "dear (add anyone), I’ve been dying to tell you..." And then along the way, she gave us 1 word at a time (10 words total) and we had about 1 minute to create our writing around each word she gave us. I wrote and just let the pen flow. When I looked back I cried...and now as I read it again almost 1 month later, I cry again. I didn't realize just how many deep emotions I was foreshadowing in that moment of writing. So I guess I’m just gonna open up my soul here and show y’all what came out. Rupi Kaur,  thank you for this joyful experience. You are my favorite ✨  #writewithrupi  . Dear self, I’ve been dying t

Quarantine | Losing My Mind or Finding It?

Well, I’m not quite sure what day it is. All of them seem to blur together. Last I recall, we had a national pandemic announced, and since then the days have meshed into one. As if they are the sky during sunset...each color holding hands with the other, smashed and meshed into a beautiful overlapping. There is no time. There is no clear ending or beginning. And while so much flaw is being uncovered in this world, to the ways our focus has likely been on the wrong things, I’m searching to find levity in all of it. And that’s hard because right now we are being taught some deep lessons. Or at least I am, so I’ll speak for myself. I realize now more than ever, just how much I have run from in my life. I have used constant work and busyness, money, my creativity, traveling, building my businesses...all the while not realizing just how much running I was doing. Man, I should be an Olympic long distance runner by now. Gold medal. But all that I have to show for in this long an